What is Gossip?

What is Gossip?

Biblically speaking, the notion of “gossip” always has a negative connotation. Proverbs associates a gossiper to a fool, one who is wicked and against God (11:13), and urges us not to associate with such a person (20:19). In 2 Corinthians, Paul appositions gossip with other ungodly traits, such as quarreling, anger, conceit, and slander (12:19), that made him show deep concern for the Corinthian church.

Yet, while many may know that “gossip” has a negative connotation, what is gossip? Is gossiping revealing secrets of other people—as the Hebrew definition suggests—or is it talking behind someone’s back? Hence, the following will exegete on the biblical topic of “gossip” in accordance to biblical principles.

Revealing secrets?

In some Bible translations, such as the ESV and ASV, the word “gossip” does not exist in the Old Testament because “gossip” (verb) is replaced with “reveals secrets”. Hence, when gossip is used in Proverbs, it is always associated with revealing secrets. For instance, in Proverbs 11:13 (NIV), it is written that “A gossip (revealing of a secret) betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.” From the text, it can be logically deducted that gossip is related with the keeping/disclosure of a secret. This is further evidenced as the parallelism of the proverb is antithetic—in which it shows a contrast between one who is wise, one who keeps a secret, compared to one who gossips, one who doesn’t. Proverbs 20:19, which writes: “A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much,” evoke a similar concept.

So, this begs a very important question: Given that “gossip” means “revealing secrets” in Hebrew, and how it is always negatively associated with foolishness and wickedness, is one who reveals a secret gossiping? Let’s first look at some practical examples and then move on to some biblical ones.

First of all, am I gossiping if I tell my parents a secret belonging to a friend of mine because I tell my parents everything and because I trust them?

Second, if I am a pastor, and a disciple of mine decides to have a relationship with someone who has a very bad history in dating (let’s say that person has had 10+ partners), am I gossiping if I let my disciple know of this fact (given that my disciple does not know of this fact and I do)? Am I gossiping when I am genuinely concerned about my disciple and when I do not want him/her to end up hurt or making a bad decision? Does not Ezekiel mention about warning those from harm’s way (3:17-19; 20:4-6; 33:9-20)?

Now let’s move on to biblical counterarguments.

First, God is known for revealing mysteries and secrets (Dan 2:22; 1 Cor 14:25; Heb 4:13 etc.). But surely, He is not “the God of gossiping”. So, just from this fact, it proves that gossip is not just the revealing of secrets.

Second, did not Christ reveal secrets and hidden motives about the religious leaders, the Scribes and Pharisees? Consider Luke 20:46-47. Christ says: “Beware of the scribes, who like to walk around in long robes, and love greetings in the marketplaces and the best seats in the synagogues and the places of honor at feasts, who devour widows' houses and for a pretense make long prayers.” While some of what Christ mentioned may be general, observable facts, some of what Christ said, as bolded above, addresses the hidden motives of the Pharisees. In other words, Christ, who knew their hearts as God knows the hearts of men (1 Sam 16:7) and weighs the motive (Prov 16:2), exposed their secret motives. But again, Christ did not gossip even though He revealed people’s secrets.

Thus, it can be concluded that, while gossip is the revealing of secrets, one who reveals secrets may not be gossiping.

Talking behind one’s back?

“Talking behind someone’s back” may currently be the most common definition of “gossiping”. While the meaning of “talking behind one’s back” may deviate from person to person, most can associate that it means that one is somewhat talking negatively about someone else. Wait, did not Christ and some apostles also do that as well?

Did not Christ tell His disciples: “Watch and beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and Sadducees” (Matt 16:6) and pronounce 7 woes to them in Matthew 23:1-36? Think about it, while some Pharisees may have heard Christ’s 7 woes, the Son of Man did not intend to address the hypocrites directly because He just finished dealing with them in chapter 22, which is why 23:1 writes “Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples.” Christ literally spoke behind the religious leaders’ back.

As for Paul, the veteran missionary wrote to the church of Philippi to look out for “the dogs”, the evildoers, and those who mutilate the flesh (3:2)—referring to a specific group of people which the church would have known. In 2 Corinthians, Paul once again calls a group of people as “false apostles”, and “deceitful workmen”, and says that their end will correspond to their deeds (2 Cor 11:13-15). So, did Paul, one of the most spiritually gifted and blameless people to ever put on Christ, gossip—when he pinpoints that gossiping is wrong (12:19)? Of course not.

Gossip…ties in with the Heart and Motive

Through logical and biblical deduction, it is evident that gossip does not purely tie in with the produced fruit, or deeds. Meaning, gossip is not purely the revealing of secrets or the talking behind one’s back; or, I may not be a gossiper just because I revealed a secret or talked to someone about another person. By no means does this imply we can freely share others’ secrets or talk behind someone’s back. However, just as God looks at the heart (1 Sam 16:7) and weighs the motive (Prov 16:2), gossip ties in closely with our motives.

Going back to Proverbs 11:13, the ESV writes: “Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered.” To slander, to make a false statement with the intent of damaging one’s reputation, is an act of a fool (10:18). Hence, this verse shows that one who gossips—reveals secrets—does so through a foolish, ungodly motive.

Proverbs 20:19, in which Solomon exhorts us to not associate with a gossiper, evoke similarly. So, whenever Proverbs tells us to “not associate with…”, “make no friendship with…”, or “do not join with those who are…”, it is always dealing more than the person’s produced fruit, but their motives and character (e.g.: Prov 22:24; 24:21).

Thus, this shows that, when Solomon mentioned about gossip, he was not purely talking about the act of revealing secrets or talking behind one’s back. He was, however, speaking about any or all of these deeds with an agenda that does not fear God. Just as how the devil is motived to steal, kill, and destroy (Jn 10:10), a gossip is similarly motived with such an agenda. Hence, a fool is not a fool because a fool does foolish, ungodly things. A fool is a fool because a fool desires wicked schemes in one’s heart (Prov 6:18; 24:2). In the same way, a gossip is not a gossip solely based on the end product—of what was being said—but when the motive is ungodly.

Conclusion: Live with Godly, God-fearing motives

I believe this article can remind us to reconsider our motives in everything we do—especially in how we use our tongue. Hebrew 13:18 (my 2^nd favorite verse) writes: “Pray for us, for we are sure that we have a clear conscience, desiring to act honorably in all things.” A clear conscience, as defined in that verse, is the desire—the motive—to act honorably in all things. A clear conscience is a qualification for an elder (2 Tim 3:9); and Paul stresses on its importance by stating that people without it suffer spiritual shipwreck (1 Tim 1:9).

Hence, while God does not just look at our motives and nothing else, do we use our tongue, the smallest part of our body (Jas 3:5), yet able to set our lives on hellish fire (3:6), with godly motives? Let us rethink our diction and ask God “does this word honor You?” before saying it, and immediately repenting of any language that could be said in a dishonorable manner.

–Barnabas Kwok